Dog Food

Sometimes I have these weird, rare, one-a-month moments where everything is beautiful, and I feel so inspired to do things. Tonight is one of those times. I just read through my most recent journal that, according to the first entry, I started on Saturday, June 15 2024.

this is she (don't peek AND DON'T LOOK AT THE BIG STAIN)

Dude. It hasn't even been a year yet, but I realized that the worries I had written have all been solved by now. I've made a lot of memories in my own way. It made me smile to read:

You can tell I was going through it because "lost student id GONE & had to WALK" is crazy

knowing that I did better than I ever thought. And not because of some fluke, but because I actually am capable of writing something worthwhile. I promise. (Yes I'm still going on about it, whateverrr)

Is it weird to want to hug your past self for being so silly and sad??? I'll probably read this next year and shake my head. I remember my mom telling me about a time where I was maybe seven or eight and running to the bus stop. It was picture day and I was wearing some dumb outfit I picked out, and in the midst of running I fell and scraped my knee, ripped my tights and had to show up like that anyways. When I heard that I just wanted to cry for her, like she was some other kid at some other time. Well. The point of this is not that I've always been a huge crybaby, BUT THAT I SHOULD BE kinder to myself!!! AND YOU SHOULD TOO!!! I'll still be that kid in a year from now, and in twenty who knows what I'll be thinking. You're only doing this thing once, and it's your first time!!! 

Anyways. So it seems like my productive spree lasted approximately 1 (one) hour, and now it's probably time to start scrolling again (just kidding) (unless), but it's fine because it's late and I have work tomorrow. 

What the heck is a weekend. 

I'm almost finished Wuthering Heights. I've been reading it (almost) every morning on the bus to work, and when I whip out my obnoxious red pen to start underlining I feel like a massively pretentious DOOFUS. But MAN, I want to remember certain things!!! The whole book feels like a giant train wreck and I'm waiting for the inevitable future death of the beast himself in some fiery explosion. 

Oh my god. The thing I made for dinner today looked like actual pet-food, my sister said it looked like a dying dog's last meal. 

BYE.